By New Years we had decided that I would move to New York. I gave notice to work upon returning from the holidays and told them I was moving to go to school. This wasn’t entirely untrue as he and I had discussed the possibility of me pursuing my MBA. What followed were a couple of months of travel between LA and New York, as well as visits to Las Vegas and San Francisco, so he and I could see each other during the three month transition of me moving to be with him.
I was ready for my adventure to begin. I kept a journal this first year of our lives together. It all felt so magical, I wanted to capture every feeling so I would never forget. I will share the entries here along with my feelings about those entries now, looking back through the prism of the past 15 years. Maybe it will help me to remember what was and how we got to this place in our marriage. I hope it will give me direction and focus to make a healthy decision for myself and my children.
After making such quick decisions to be with my husband so many years ago, I don’t want to do the same in trying to leave our relationship. I am eager to start a new year and put 2012 behind me. All relationships go through struggles and bad times. I just hope the pain of the past year lessens and I can learn to trust and love him again.