Birthday Cupcakes

Then – A little more recent for today – One Year Ago

My husband is in the kitchen making his own birthday cupcakes with our kids and basically told me to get out of the way in front of them.  I don’t think it is good, for my daughter in particular, to see her mother treated like this in a marriage.  His cruelty is really helping me make my decision about staying married.  I will consult the attorney, but can’t imagine staying married to such a mean person.  I’ve put up with it for years and now I am wondering why.  The ironic thing is that he’s the one who wants a divorce.

Cupcake making is turning sour.  Kids are not neat enough for him.  They are getting a lecture.  Typically we have a good time in the kitchen and worry about messes later.  Inside I’m glad it’s not going well.

This is upsetting to me for many reasons.  He is making cupcakes with batter and frosting that I purchased to make him cupcakes for his birthday next week.  He always wants the same thing – yellow cake with chocolate frosting.  Maybe this is his way to make sure I don’t do anything nice for his birthday.  I think I should be thankful not to have to go through the motions.  He didn’t do anything for my birthday, not surprisingly, but I still thought I’d have the kids make him cupcakes.  I guess the job is done now.  On my birthday we all went to Moe’s.  I felt so sad and miserable.  Thank goodness my friends took me out.

Now – We’ll see how today goes.  Cupcakes still waiting to be made for his birthday dinner.  The children want to do it when they get home from school.

Last night my friend said that I had the power to make the decision to leave this marriage.  I may have the power, but I just don’t have the strength to break up my children’s family.  How much longer can I undermine my own happiness for the sake of my children?


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