Deja Vu

Then – October 3, 1998

Life continues  to move forward.  I really thought about applying for another job last week.  Things are slow at work which makes it even more unbearable.  I like the people that I work with, so that helps.

Marcus and I talked about a lot of things.  I’m not sure how it will all work out, but we are doing okay.

Marcus can be so wonderful.  I really liked being with him yesterday just doing stuff.  He can make me so happy, but also so sad.  This week was a good one.  Let’s hope it continues.

Now – Life continues to move forward.  I am really thinking about what I want to be when I grow up (after kids are a bit older and I have more flexibility to work).  Things have been a bit tedious lately and not that fulfilling, but I have a lot of good friends which helps.

Marcus and I have talked about a lot of things.  I’m not sure how it will all work out, but we are doing okay.

He can be so wonderful.  I really liked being with him last weekend.  He can make me so happy, but also so sad.  This week has been a good one.  Let’s hope it continues.

Basically the same, right?  Fifteen years later.  So curious that I have the same sentiments and can basically copy a journal entry from so long ago.  I am feeling optimistic however.  I feel confident that no matter how this turns out, I have a good future.

I can look at him more openly now.  He is good with the kids and really tries to make a difference in their lives.  He is helping me with the dishes and appreciating the effort to make dinner.  It really is the little things that help you get from one day to the next.  Right now I don’t need roses and diamonds.  I just need kind words and loving support.  Can he do it?

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